Should you try to change a Predator/Abuser?

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There are many in this world who have a compassionate heart and as such are driven to make a difference, to make a change.  After all, as Christians we are called to be the light of the world and the salt of the earth. (Matthew 5:13-16)

Does this mean that we should try to change people, that we should try to change a person who is clearly showing the dangerous traits of an abuser, predator and a manipulator?  Should we go into a relationship thinking we can change a person by being a light to them and salt to them…a flavor?

Personally, I have learned the hard way that a person cannot be changed by another person…only God can do that.  If a person does not want to be changed they will not change, they will only devour your flavor that you give to the world and you will be left flavorless…salt-less, light-less–extinguished, and only the grace of Jesus will revive you (and the grace of Jesus is great because the Bible DOES say nothing can separate you from His love, so don’t let satan blind you from the cross).  The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? (NASB) In a relationship, you are not to be bound together with someone who doesn’t believe in Christ as you do because of the fact that YOU cannot change them and there is no guarantee that they will ever come to Christ and you will suffer for this because either you will be pulled away from the light that is in your heart, or worse the abuser, manipulator/predator will do far worse (remember you cannot change a person).

This being said, there are ministries in church that DO minister to people that are disturbed, that have mental problems and you CAN partner with such groups to reach out to such people if that is your desire and if that is where your heart is.  There are churches and local ministries in your areas (I can almost guarantee you) that minister to prisons, to shelters, to all sorts of groups that are in need of hearts such as yours.  My recommendation is to PARTNER with such groups and never go alone.  You CAN do something, you CAN be a light in the darkness and the HOLY SPIRIT can reach out to a lost soul through you, but don’t go alone.  Be smart.

As always, I stress, don’t become a victim.  Christ never intended that.

Matthew 10:16-20  “Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves.  But beware of men, for they will hand you over to the courts and scourge you in their synagogues; and you will even be brought before governors and kings for My sake, as a testimony to them and to the Gentiles.  But when they hand you over, do not worry about how or what you are to say; for it will be given to you in that hour what you are to say.  For it is not you who speak, but it is the Spirit of the Father who speaks in you.  (NASB Bold added by me)

See, Jesus never intended for us to be blind victims, He wants us to be wise in our walk, and when we are to speak out and let His light burst forth…UNDERSTAND that it is the Spirit of the Father speaking…and ultimately dear one THAT IS WHAT WILL CHANGE A PERSON, because it is the power of the Gospel that is life changing.

That is what I will leave you with:

Romans 1:16  For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. (NASB)

LUKEWARM CHRISTIAN HE WILL SPIT YOU OUT

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REVELATION 3:16 (nasb)

16 So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth.

I honestly can’t say that I’m surprised.  This past week I have seen people who are ashamed of Christ who cowered behind political correctness and ‘tolerance’ (which by the way if you haven’t noticed…is NOT given back).  I have seen this mantra repeated over and over to the point of making me sick:  God is love.  (Period)  But as I mentioned in my previous post…He is so much more:  He is just, He takes vengeance, He is forgiving, He is merciful,  He is all knowing, He is holy and perfect without a single flaw.  None of those were mentioned by any of the lukewarm Christians.

I am not surprised or shocked at the way people who don’t claim to be Christian act (they at least have the excuse of not knowing God on a personal level), but CHRISTIANS who claim to know God and His word condoning the homosexual lifestyle is inexcusable….for heaven’s sake at least don’t claim to be Christian, no one is forcing you to bear that name.  Perhaps these people are timid and afraid to loose a friend if they express what the Bible says on this subject.  Perhaps they think God will compromise on what He said not to do.  Perhaps they think they are being loving.  But I ask you, if you truly believe in Christ and that the Bible says He is the only way, and that the Bible tells what is right and what is wrong…how in the world do you consider it being loving not to tell a person that because they don’t know Christ they are going to hell?  Don’t you want to see that friend in heaven?  Are you so selfish that you won’t put your fears aside and lovingly but boldly speak the truth about what the Bible says instead of sugaring things up?  That dear on is hate, not love…because for the sake of not offending someone you will not tell that person the truth that could have saved them…what if no one else will put that choice before them and tomorrow they die?  How will you be able to have a clear conscience that the person you called friend will eternally suffer because you couldn’t sit down and put before them the choice of forgiveness that is offered by Jesus Christ?  That person’s blood will be asked out of your hands…and you dear lukewarm Christian will be spit out of God’s mouth.

I wonder what would have happened if Jesus did not speak out, if He let fear stop Him from going to the cross.  You dear Christian know what would have happened…hell would await us all if our ransom for our sins (mistakes, lies, adultery, cheating, hate, stealing, gossiping, homosexuality, drunkenness, etc).

I wonder how you dear lukewarm Christian would feel when you stand before the Savior He will be just as ashamed of you as you are of Him and His word?

Luke 9:26 (NASB)

26 For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when He comes in His glory, and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.

That dear lukewarm Christian is what will happen.

I am not saying to be hateful, but I am saying not to cower.  Standing for the truth is never, ever easy…and most of the time people hate the truth.  But the truth is always worth it because it is steady and unchanging.

Here is a quote that I love:

“Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.”

–Alexander Hamilton

CHOOSE NOW WHOM YOU WILL SERVE:

Joshua 24:15(NASB)

15 If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve: whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

You can’t be both with this world that will one day perish and with God.  You really can’t have it both ways.  Either you will please one and anger another and visa versa.  Who would you rather anger?  The world which can judge your body?  Or  God who can judge your eternal soul.

To those who are not Christian and reading this, please understand that the above portion is not referring to you, it is strictly for those who claim to follow Jesus Christ.

For those who are not Christian and reading this blog I do have a message for you as well if you are willing to read on:

I don’t hate you.  If I don’t agree with your lifestyle does not mean that I hate you.  For example, you might be perfectly okay with sleeping around before marriage, whereas I am not, I believe in giving that kind of love to one person.  But if your lifestyle is like that I do not hate you.  The same if you are homosexual.  Please understand my conviction and that of my fellow Christians.  We believe in a loving, just, holy, perfect God who has the best intentions for all on this planet (therefore the laws He gives are given to protect our bodies from disease and our souls from hell).  If I as a Christian that something is not pleasing to God according to the Bible, I do not say it with malice or hate…sure, I DO get fired up…it is how I express myself when I am passionate and I firmly believe something (perhaps you are the same in that perspective), but I don’t say it with malice or hate…I say it with passionate love, with a passionate desire that you come to know Jesus Christ so that you can know how awesome He is and that you would have a heavenly attorney who will when accused by satan of your every mistake and sin, He would be able to erase your sin and pay the ransom for your soul and give you entrance into heaven…not the eternal, painful prison of hell.  If I hated you, I wouldn’t bother writing this and I wouldn’t risk my good standing in your eyes.  If I hated you, I would keep silent and let you go to hell…because silence is often easier than speaking.

John 3:16(NASB)

16 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

John 8:9-11 (NASB)

When they heard it, they began to go out one by one, beginning with the older ones, and He was left alone, and the woman, where she was, in the center of the court. 10 Straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said,“I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more.”

What you need to know about following Jesus is this:

–If you come to Him and accept Him into your heart and soul, and ask forgiveness for your sins (your wrongs), He WILL forgive your EVERY sin.

–He will begin to change you and through His word will teach you right from wrong.

–As with the woman caught in adultery (in the above verse mentioned) He plainly told her He does not condemn her…and yet He ALSO told her FROM NOW ON SIN NO MORE.  Meaning He was telling her to stop living a lifestyle that is not according to the word of God.  (Jesus had saved this woman from being stoned to death for her sin).  When you come to Him and ask forgiveness and you accept Him as your Lord and Savior, your RESCUER from satan, HE FORGIVES YOU, you get A BRAND NEW FRESH START IN THE EYES OF HEAVEN (consequences on earth may still remain, however you name is written permanently God’s book of Life)…when you come to Him and ask for forgiveness, like I say he gives it, but just as with the adulterous woman He tells you: FROM NOW ON SIN NO MORE.

–Even after putting your life in His protective hands, you WILL still make mistakes…being a follower of Christ does not mean you are perfect.  It means that when you make a mistake you can come to Him and ask forgiveness and He will help you start again.  (Please understand that there is no way you can take advantage of God…He knows your heart, if you are sincere or not)  Still, you are a new creation through Jesus and when that day of Judgement comes and satan (who DOES remember every mistake and sin) comes before the throne of God to tell Him why you should go to hell, Jesus Christ will stand in front of you and God will declare you pure and clean, because when Jesus stands as your advocate, He wins (He paid your ransom with His blood).

I pray that God will lead you to Him dear reader, I pray that if not on this earth…I shall see you there in heaven (and against contrary belief….God is not a boring God who made a boring heaven, there will be wonders untold that I look forward to discovering along with you!)